EDUCATION GUEST POST CAITLIN FROM: Mother Down Under.

Today’s guest post comes from Caitlin at Mother DownUnder. I don’t know how Caitlin manages everything in her life, she is mother to adorable Toddler C, works as a theater nurse, teaches Hypnobirthing, is studying to obtain her Masters in Health Practice, and has her fantastic blog, I am more than a little impressed with her. Caitlin is one talented woman! Make sure you pop over to Caitlin's blog, and two facebook pages and give her a lot of love.

I remember reading an article about the differences between raising boys and girls.  

The author claimed that when a mother is rearing a son she isn't as concerned about their independence..."mommies' boys" are tolerated and even celebrated in our society and since boys will grow up to be men, their dominance is assured.  So boys are coddled and cuddled and indulged without a mother wondering how this will affect their future. 

However a mother who is raising a girl worries about her being independent and self-assured enough to survive and thrive what still is a man's world.  As a result little girls are encouraged and even pushed to become strong and resilient and taught that they have to prove their worth.

Reflecting on my childhood, I know that my parents believed that education was the way to create independent women and I know that they sacrificed all that they had and then some to ensure that my sister and I had the best education available to us.  

I am sure that there were emotional costs...my sister and I both went to boarding school starting at age thirteen.  

And there certainly were financial costs...when I add up the cost of what has been fed to my brain, it is staggering.

I wonder if I will make such sacrifices to educate my son?  

Caitlin's gorgeous son.

I absolutely think that education is important for both boys and girls.  And I will of course do all that it takes to ensure that my son enjoys learning.  

But do I believe that education is as crucial for my son and his future as it would be for a daughter's future? 

Do I think my son will be appreciated and valued for who he is regardless of where he goes to high school?

Do I think girls have it that easy?  No.  I think girls and women are taught that being female is not enough and that education provides them with something concrete that proves that they have value.

I hope that, by the time my boy becomes a man, the world becomes a more fair and equitable place.  

And I hope that he grows up appreciating girls and women for who they are and celebrates their inherent worth.

Please Note: Images and words are Caitlin's unless otherwise indicated. 

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This week it was all about ‘Selfies’ as it has been just Jarvis and I for most of the week. So I put the camera on self timer and then we jumped in front of it. I ended up with a lot of blurry images. But we had fun taking them, and jumping on the bed and cuddling. That boy is the best cuddlier! 

Jodi over at Che and Fidel has inspired me to pick up my camera and turn the focus inward. Since I already take 100s of photos of my children each week, so I thought I would twist the idea a little. What I never seem to get is group shots, images of the family together, whether it is my two children, Tamika and Jarvis, or me with the kids, or shots of Justin and I. So I am going to challenge myself to get one image of "my family" per week.

THEN AND NOW PARENTING

As I was slathering Jarvis with sun screen, and then layering on the sun shirt, hat, and making sure he was under the shade of the brolly before letting him in the pool, I thought how different I am in so many ways from my parents, yet I am so much the same.

As a child I was lucky to get a crocheted bikini as protection, even Susie with her pale skin was put out in the sun. We joked as children, and as adults, that our mother needed a rotisserie as she loved to bake so much in the sun. There were no time limits, no sun screen, no hats, definitely not a brolly, unless it was to keep the booze cool. A visit to the beach or a pool was all about how much sun we could all get. I remember coming home, as a child, with skin so burnt, it was stiff and painful to move.

Now I am not sure whether it is helicopter parenting or more education on skin cancer, but I am so neurotic about Jarvis getting burnt. I hear myself often nagging him to play in the shade and get out of the sun. I even limit the amount of time he plays outside in the middle part of the day, as this new house does not offer much in the way of protection from the sun.

As I floated in the pool beside Jarvis (yes I had such a tough morning) I began to wonder how much of me was in contrast to my parents and how much of me was the same? Is everything I do a direct reaction from my childhood?

Okay so tell me… what do you do that is exactly like you parents? And what is that you do that is different?.

Jarvis floated out into the sun, all relaxed and laid back in the pool, I was the neurotic mother yelling "kick back over into the shade".

IT BEGINS AGAIN

Yes, I am definitely mad. Not only am a building yet another garden, in another rental house, I am doing it in the heat. Brisbane, I would like to ask you…what happened to spring?

We started on the week-end. Yet again Dad has come to the rescue, by helping me build the garden bed. Now I am doing the manual labor of digging.

The first part of the garden has been landscaped, and I am going to take cues from this and extend it back.  I have plans to dig an area flat, near the garden bed. Once this is flat I am going to use logs and pavers to build an area that could be for a swing seat or such. I will see how much digging this old body can handle. Swing seat may turn into a tiny chair. The soil I am using to fill the garden bed, to save on having to buy any.

It would help if I had the correct tools. Hmm think I need to get myself a Hardware sponsorship! Dear Hardware store I would really, really love a pick or mattock. Oh and a T2 sponsorship. I drink that by the buckets as I am digging. I have a new favourite Honey Vanilla. It is almost as good as the Fruit Blush.

Oh, and yes the clothes line is on its side. Another job I have to do is dig a hole and concrete the old line in a nice sunny space.

We dig dig dig dig dig dig dig in our mine the whole day through

To dig dig dig dig dig dig dig is what we really like to do

It ain't no trick to get rich quick

If you dig dig dig with a shovel or a pick

In a mine! In a mine! In a mine! In a mine!

Where a million diamonds shine!

 The backyard when you look up.

The backyard when you look down. So much prettier.

 Washing on the side.

Still so much work to be done.

Tira hiding in the house, as it is too hot to go outside.

EDUCATION GUEST POST VANISHA FROM: Vanisha's Life In Australia

For the second guest post, in a serious of guest posts from women whom I admire I just knew I had to invite Vanisha from Vanisha's Life in Australia. I have been a long admirer of Vanisha and her blog, in some ways our lives have many parallels. Even though Vanisha is young enough to be my daughter, I feel as if I have so much I can learn from her. I just hope one day our lives will converge and we can meet in real time. Make sure you pop over to Vanisha's blog and say hello. 

What Will I Do With My Education

Julie invited me to be part of her Educating Women Series at a moment where my days seem to be consumed by education of the formal variety. I'm 27 years old, and I am currently 12 weeks shy of submitting my doctoral thesis. I have been in university for almost nine years and have attained numerous qualifications. The PhD was something I wanted to do for me - to push myself and because I love nothing more than writing, research and reading. Now, as I come to the end of this journey I am often asked what I'm going to do next.

For the longest time, I thought I was going to be a mum. I figured that in the final year of my PhD I would be beautifully round and pregnant. A few months ago I found out that that it would not be the case. You can read my infertility related posts here. 

Motherhood was something I was going to do for the next few years. It was something I wanted more than anything. "You're doing a PhD so that you can stay home and have children?" Yes. And No. I'm doing a PhD because I can. And I can have a PhD and stay at home. I'm allowed to choose that. To have a career. Or not. To stay at home. Or not. Or to do both. I just wanted to stay at home.

image via

Now, things are a little different. I'm considering a few things. Blogging full time. I love my blog, I love what I've done with it, the friends I've made and the connections and relationships I've fostered. I'm considering teaching (primary or secondary school) - ie - studying more. To be able teach I'd have to do a Diploma in Education. I'm tossing up ideas.

This "indecision" is not because I don't know who I am or what I want to do. I think it's because I have a strong sense of who I am and have a firm belief that I will excel at things that I am passionate about. And I am passionate about a few things. So there is my dilemma. I know what I'm good at, and I know what I love (though some of the things I really love I'm not really good at...yet).

I will however do two things with my education. I will make a difference in my country, even in a small way. It maybe in the form of a teacher at a school, a mentor, a researcher or perhaps I will take thislittle reading space initiative and turn it into something much bigger. I am determined to make a difference. This is necessary.

The reading space I helped set up

The other thing I will do with my education is more personal, and it is to respect, own and enjoy my right to decide on my path. The education I have had may have been an "opportunity" but I had to make the opportunity work. The entire process is filled with my work, struggles, hopes and joys. I got me to this point - though obviously not on my own - and because of this I will not feel bad or guilty that I may be 'wasting' all this talent or education by deciding to be a blogger or a clown or whatever I decide! I will make a difference in my own way. 

I think it's important not to assume that just because a person is well educated that they seek a career. Some do and some don't and that choice and decision needs to be respected. I understand why people say that I must do certain things because there is no one else - believe me I understand, especially in places like the Pacific. Taking up an academic position or public office is not the only way to contribute. There are people who want these things and I strongly encourage that they continue studying and working towards these goals. But it's just as important to support, or at least respect, those who wish to contribute in other, perhaps more unconventional, ways. My education is a significant part of who I am, but it is not the only part.

Please Note: Images and words are Vanisha's unless otherwise indicated. 

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I am not good with saying good-bye.

Jarvis connects us, making us a family. Tamika fresh out of hospital, with her ice-pack in hand also came to say good-bye.

For some reason every time Justin asks for a kiss off Jarvis, Jarvis licks his face.

Good-byes are always hard. But last night’s good-bye was even harder for so many reasons. Justin and I have never been apart for as long as we are going to be. Justin has never been away from Jarvis for any length of time. While Jarvis and I stay and adjust to living in a new house, Justin is off on an adventure. An adventure that is more than a holiday, Justin is volunteering his time and expertise as a photographer, to document and promote a school that my cousin, Margaret has fundraised and built. (More on Margaret and the amazing work she has been doing later) But it is also bittersweet for me Justin is going off to do my fantasy job/thing. I have always wanted to travel the world and raise awareness for education in Third World countries.

Jam you are going to be so missed. We… I love you.

Note: Tamika took the group images for me. 

Jodi over at Che and Fidel has inspired me to pick up my camera and turn the focus inward. Since I already take 100s of photos of my children each week, so I thought I would twist the idea a little. What I never seem to get is group shots, images of the family together, whether it is my two children, Tamika and Jarvis, or me with the kids, or shots of Justin and I. So I am going to challenge myself to get one image of "my family" per week.

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A little late, but here is last weeks Family Portrait from the 52 Series. The week’s image was quickly snatched in a moment between moving. How could I not feature Justin’s cousin, the wonderful Craig who took time out on his week-end to spend Sunday with us and helping us move?  

Thank you Craig for giving us your day, you strength and your thoughtful nature.

Jodi over at Che and Fidel has inspired me to pick up my camera and turn the focus inward. Since I already take 100s of photos of my children each week, so I thought I would twist the idea a little. What I never seem to get is group shots, images of the family together, whether it is my two children, Tamika and Jarvis, or me with the kids, or shots of Justin and I. So I am going to challenge myself to get one image of "my family" per week.

OUR 'NAMELESS' NEW HOUSE

We did it! We survived the move. It was an epic week-end of packing, moving, and cleaning. But with the help of family…. Thank you Mum for coming down from Bribie to help me clean two houses… Thank you Craig, for yet again, being the second set of muscles and helping us move house.

We went from having an empty house on Friday to today, Wednesday, to almost totally unpacked and set up. I will not lie; look at the last image there is still some to go. However, the bulk of that is my sewing. Justin’s desk got broken in the move so he has my old sewing table. So until he gets back from Cambodia, it is the dining table for my sewing.

What is left are the little things, a couple of boxes of ‘stuff’ that you don’t want to throw, but you do not know what to do with. A few curtains still need to be hung, I have sewn them, I just need a hack saw, to shorten the curtain rods. Plus none of our art works are up on the walls (we need confirmation on just how many hooks we are allowed).

But I feel happy we are set up and unpacked. Now to fine tune the place to make it our home.

 The above two images were taken Friday.

 Moving was exhausting for both Jarvis and Tira. Yes the house has three bedroom, but we all are sleeping in one.

Love how all of my Kitchenaid appliances match this new house.

GIVEAWAYS. BLOG LOVE. PARCELS FROM THE POSTMAN

It was my birthday last week. However, yesterday it felt like it was all over again. In the mail I received not one, but two lovely gifts from two amazing women. It is no secret I am a huge fan of old fashion mail, but receiving parcels is heaven!

The first is a Raw Food Recipe Book, which Bella from Sea and Salt gave me, The Art of raw Living Food. The second parcel contained Natural Instincts Baby Range, which Caitlin, from Mother Down Under, hosted a giveaway on her blog.. Caitlin you have no idea how much Jarvis is going to love this. Everyday he spends ages moisturising, so I cannot wait to try this on him.

In the middle of the chaos of moving home, I was thinking how wonderful this blogging community is. So I wanted to stop packing (well who blames me, no one enjoys packing) and hop on her to say thank you to two women who underline why I love blogging. No, not the giveaways, but the sense of community. 

EDUCATION GUEST POST: TAMIKA FROM Glamorous Goddess

This week kicks off the first in a serious of guest posts from women whom I admire. I thought it was an obvious choice that I start with Tamika's. She is not just my child, but she taught me how to be a Mum. 

Most kids my age were getting their learners, I got a different ride. 

When I was asked by Julie (Mum), to write an education post I thought to myself, what the hell am I going to write about? I didn’t have a bad education, I went to great schools, had friends, didn’t get bullied that bad that it traumatised me. However, then I thought about what I learnt when I became seriously ill in 2009.

I was diagnosed with Guillain-Barré Syndrome, and that was and still is a pretty traumatic time in my life. You’re probably thinking what is GBS? Don’t worry, Mum and I thought exactly the same when the doctor told us. GBS is a disorder affecting the peripheral nervous system. Ascending paralysis, weakness beginning in the feet and hands and migrating towards the trunk, is the most typical symptom, and some subtypes cause change in sensation or pain, as well as dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system.

All this explained the symptoms I had for the past three, almost four weeks leading up to my diagnosis. I thought I had the flu and vomiting. Mum took me to the doctor on the Monday and he said as much. I was 16 at the time and it was the beginning of grade 11, and had only attended one day of school. Well not even one day as I passed out and was sent home.

On the Wednesday Mum took me back to the doctor, and he immediately sent me to the Mater children’s hospital. Mum and I were blasé about it, going home to get my ipod and magazines. We arrived at the hospital early afternoon, by late afternoon I was paralyzed to the waist. Later that night it affected my neck and face. (I was to learn later on how lucky I was that my internal organs were not touched).

What followed was three nightmare days of spinal taps, full body scans and so many blood test I looked like a pin cushion. Friday morning we were told it was not brain cancer. Friday night they finally diagnosed me.

After six weeks of hospital time I was allowed to return home, Mum and I just wanted out. As she was doing most of the palliative care, we did not see why we could not go home.  After Mum did some very persuasive arguing, I was allowed to go home, but only on the conditions that I had full-time carer for the next few months. This involved, someone showering me, helping me go to the toilet, getting driven to my physio appointments, and just generally having someone stare at me making sure there was no relapse. Mum and I had a LOT of one on one time.

It was a very tedious few months, lots of pain and just having people judging me not knowing the real facts as to why I was in a wheel chair, or had a gastric tube. It amazed me at how ignorant some people can be, even those with their own sick children, I had many parents (guess) diagnose my illness. One diagnose I got a lot was anorexia. I have always been skinny, on top of this I had lost almost 13 kgs in under a week. It got tiring telling people I was vomiting because my Larynx was one of the first things to become paralyzed and physically could not keep food down. In hospital was like being in jail, people would ask ‘What are you in for?’

I found this whole experience in my life a very scary time. It was not easy seeing my family cry, or worry for me; I felt I had to be the strong one out of this whole situation. So for the whole time in hospital I put up a wall to try and be strong to get me through. Although it helped and it pushed me to get myself off the floor, quite literally, it was not healthy for my mind. It pushed me into a state of depression. After I got home and things seemed to get better for me health wise, but mentally I could not understand all of it.

My boyfriend of the time was amazing! He was definitely my rock for a long time, we were really good friends not just a couple. He was up at the hospital every afternoon taking me for my walks around the building and just telling me about school and trying to keep it as normal as possible. He pushed me around in a wheel chair for weeks. But then it came to an end we broke up, which was devastating for me because I felt like I was losing a friend not just a boyfriend.

I look back at this time in my life, now it being 4 years ago. I have changed my whole attitude and life to make me a better person. Although, school was kind of a bust after this I still managed to pass grade 12 with A’s and B’s. Now I have a great job at Kids Helpline. I live with my boyfriend of 2 and half years, and I have a really supportive family.

Hated the food tube.

Making friends with other 'inmates' and escaping.

The nurses were so nice

Thank you so much Tamika for contributing to this series. Below are links to her Blog and Facebook Page.

ggshair.blogspot.com.au

https://www.facebook.com/GlamoursGoddess?fref=ts